i went adventuring today.
it was... fun. wet, mind you. but fun.
a few weeks ago, a good friend and i went on what we called a "pseudo-epic Sabbath adventure." it was amazing. literally one of the best days of my life. (i hope to (finally) be able to write about it soon.)
and one of the places we went that day was a neighborhood in Chi-town called "Wicker Park." it's super-trendy; known for music, fashion and art - totally my kind of place. honestly - i'm a country girl at heart, but if i were ever to live in a city, this is one of the places in which i'd be at home.
so i went back today. i had three possible destinations in mind. one of them was The Boring Store. it was one of the places my friend and i had meant to go, but they were closed by the time we got there. i thought about stopping in - i mean, it's amazing, and i really want to go - but it just didn't feel right, going without him. so i skipped it, and headed directly to one of the other places on my list: Myopic Books. so glad i did. i was literally less than a block from the store when one of the biggest storms i've seen for awhile swept through town. granted, we haven't seen a lot of storms this summer, but it was big enough that i got completely covered in dirt from the wind that whipped thru before the rain started, and i was extremely grateful to be indoors during the worst of the downpour.
and it was a lovely place to be stranded.
80,000+ titles to choose from. super-cool building - it used to be a jewelry shop, and the iron bars that used to section off part of the store are still there, and the mystery section is in the vault downstairs (sadly, it was closed today, so i didn't get to see it, but how cool is that?!). jazz music. reading nooks. did i mention 80,000+ titles to choose from? just imagine how many shelves that takes, and how lost you can get in them...
i came home with 2 "new" used treasures: A Live Coal in the Sea - a Madeleine L'Engle book I haven't read yet!! and Gluten-Free Girl - which I am totally looking forward to reading. a healthier lifestyle is on the horizon, and I think this book (and her blog) may be key to it.
the other place i meant to go (and didn't) was a coffee house called "SIP" - but as it was raining, and part of the charm is their garden, i decided to skip it. we'll save that for a day when i have a sunny afternoon to spend blogging outdoors. so i ended up at Starbucks, as usual, because i had a gift card and the chai was therefore "free" (yay!) - and because it was less than 20 yards from the parking spot i'd snagged (after much driving about).
it probably wasn't the holiest Sabbath ever. but being out of the house - out of town, even - was a very good thing after this long, long week. i needed a change of scene, and He knew it. and i'm betting the books i found will be worth the long drive. even the drive itself was worth it...
i've missed taking road trips with Jesus. so many of them lately have been so short. i am long overdue for a week-long one. maybe in September. maybe. spiritually - it's a really great idea. financially - maybe not so much.... :/
so that's one for the prayer hopper....
anyway. not much of an update, i know. but that was my day. and somehow... somehow today mattered. and i wanted to write about it. so there you are.
maybe it's just that i'm learning again to have fun by myself. so much of the past 7 months have been about learning to connect, building meaningful relationships, having (local, and deep) community again for the first time in a really long time. today i ditched that and went back to a little bit of what my old life (a more introverted, more artsy, more solitary life) was like. and it was good. not great - and not without its lonelier moments - but good. and i'm glad.
Showing posts with label simple felicity: good books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label simple felicity: good books. Show all posts
random ramblings, vol. 12
it's been a month and a half (or more)? how did that happen (again)?
so, quickly! without further ado: random ramblings, vol. 12:
1) on the gift of this rainy Sabbath Saturday, i've spent a lovely afternoon catching up on my blog crawl. as ever, there was so much wisdom and encouragement to be found! here are just a few of the posts i'd recommend:
- for those going through a tough season in ministry and feeling the weight of their calling: Carrying My Cross, by Kathryn over at Good in Parts (i also loved her post on Mothering Sunday)
- wondering if that simple act of kindness you felt compelled toward will really matter? it will. check out this awesome video in Robb's post about Kindness
- on prayer and authenticity: hey, i'll pray for you by T at exfake.com
- on pretty-ing up the clutter (can't wait to borrow this idea for my desk!): Simple Clutter Buster: A Kids' Art Center from Wendy at The Shabby Nest
- on the creative process: 5 Brainstorming Techniques I Stole For You by Carlos Whittaker at Ragamuffin Soul
- for your theological entertainment: John vs. John: Stop the Presses: John Piper Thinks Christianity Is Masculine - John Stackhouse responds to yet another poorly argued point by John Piper (who does, by the way, love Jesus and means well, even when he (somewhat frequently) misses it, like the rest of us often do)
- for further theological entertainment: Moses Was A Wuss & Potential Viral Sensation by Aaron Earls, guest-posted on Jon Acuff's Stuff Christians Like
2) this year has been ... well, insane. as usual. in somewhat unusual ways. but its chief blessing thus far has been an absolutely unexpected and amazing friendship with an incredible man who speaks life, truth, encouragement and freedom into me on pretty much a daily basis. #blessedbeyondmeasure
in truth: i'm not entirely sure i believe him when he says he gets a great friendship out of this, too - he's sure as heck seen a lot more of my dark side than i have of his! - but i am truly grateful for the gift that his friendship has become - and it's been a gift straight from heaven, no mistake
3) for the first time in years, i am taking a road trip with Jesus AND people. lol. a few of us are heading south for the first two days of spring break to the Catalyst conference in Alpharetta, GA. can't wait - both for the fun that 28+ hours in a van with 5 soon-to-be-dearer friends will be, and for the breath of life and inspiration that the conference itself will be to our leadership team!
4) book reviews pending - i'm reading (or have read and not yet blogged about) a ton of inspirational stuff right now, and am looking forward to reviewing these books for you shortly:
Close Enough To Hear God Breathe - by Greg Paul
How I Changed My Mind About Women In Leadership - by a collection of prominent evangelicals
Sacred Unions, Sacred Passions: Exploring The Mystery of Friendship Between Men and Women - by Dan Brennan
5) Sabbath - can i just tell you how grateful i am for this day?! because i am.
6) introvert meets pastoral ministry: ugh. and ... oh, wow. at the same time. and not necessarily always in that order. had an absolutely wonderful time last night, hanging out with two of my closest friends and a new friend: a woman from my church i'd only ever talked to once, but have found in such a short span of time to be such a kindred spirit. can't wait to spend more time with her and her amazing family. (after i recover from that many hours in the presence of actual people...) ;-)
7) food. is. awesome.
there's nothing like fasting for an extended period of time to make you appreciate the nutritional gift and visible beauty that food does actually hold. i am more grateful (halfway thru this current fast) for protein, color, and taste than i have been in a very long time. looking forward to the wonderment that comes every summer during weekly trips to Stade's Farm, and to celebrating on every Sabbath Saturday the beauty of creation reflected in anything as simple and complex as the amazing meal we call "dinner"...
and there you have it. random ramblings - (almost) concluded.
except i do have one final thing to say:
8) my friend-whom-i-have-never-met, Barry, paid me the highest compliment a few weeks ago (see the comments section of his post). when i first "met" Barry, he was blogging at Honest Faith. now he blogs at Atheos (Godless). both blogs are well worth your time, regardless of what you believe.
so, quickly! without further ado: random ramblings, vol. 12:
1) on the gift of this rainy Sabbath Saturday, i've spent a lovely afternoon catching up on my blog crawl. as ever, there was so much wisdom and encouragement to be found! here are just a few of the posts i'd recommend:
- for those going through a tough season in ministry and feeling the weight of their calling: Carrying My Cross, by Kathryn over at Good in Parts (i also loved her post on Mothering Sunday)
- wondering if that simple act of kindness you felt compelled toward will really matter? it will. check out this awesome video in Robb's post about Kindness
- on prayer and authenticity: hey, i'll pray for you by T at exfake.com
- on pretty-ing up the clutter (can't wait to borrow this idea for my desk!): Simple Clutter Buster: A Kids' Art Center from Wendy at The Shabby Nest
- on the creative process: 5 Brainstorming Techniques I Stole For You by Carlos Whittaker at Ragamuffin Soul
- for your theological entertainment: John vs. John: Stop the Presses: John Piper Thinks Christianity Is Masculine - John Stackhouse responds to yet another poorly argued point by John Piper (who does, by the way, love Jesus and means well, even when he (somewhat frequently) misses it, like the rest of us often do)
- for further theological entertainment: Moses Was A Wuss & Potential Viral Sensation by Aaron Earls, guest-posted on Jon Acuff's Stuff Christians Like
2) this year has been ... well, insane. as usual. in somewhat unusual ways. but its chief blessing thus far has been an absolutely unexpected and amazing friendship with an incredible man who speaks life, truth, encouragement and freedom into me on pretty much a daily basis. #blessedbeyondmeasure
in truth: i'm not entirely sure i believe him when he says he gets a great friendship out of this, too - he's sure as heck seen a lot more of my dark side than i have of his! - but i am truly grateful for the gift that his friendship has become - and it's been a gift straight from heaven, no mistake
3) for the first time in years, i am taking a road trip with Jesus AND people. lol. a few of us are heading south for the first two days of spring break to the Catalyst conference in Alpharetta, GA. can't wait - both for the fun that 28+ hours in a van with 5 soon-to-be-dearer friends will be, and for the breath of life and inspiration that the conference itself will be to our leadership team!
4) book reviews pending - i'm reading (or have read and not yet blogged about) a ton of inspirational stuff right now, and am looking forward to reviewing these books for you shortly:
Close Enough To Hear God Breathe - by Greg Paul
How I Changed My Mind About Women In Leadership - by a collection of prominent evangelicals
Sacred Unions, Sacred Passions: Exploring The Mystery of Friendship Between Men and Women - by Dan Brennan
5) Sabbath - can i just tell you how grateful i am for this day?! because i am.
6) introvert meets pastoral ministry: ugh. and ... oh, wow. at the same time. and not necessarily always in that order. had an absolutely wonderful time last night, hanging out with two of my closest friends and a new friend: a woman from my church i'd only ever talked to once, but have found in such a short span of time to be such a kindred spirit. can't wait to spend more time with her and her amazing family. (after i recover from that many hours in the presence of actual people...) ;-)
7) food. is. awesome.
there's nothing like fasting for an extended period of time to make you appreciate the nutritional gift and visible beauty that food does actually hold. i am more grateful (halfway thru this current fast) for protein, color, and taste than i have been in a very long time. looking forward to the wonderment that comes every summer during weekly trips to Stade's Farm, and to celebrating on every Sabbath Saturday the beauty of creation reflected in anything as simple and complex as the amazing meal we call "dinner"...
and there you have it. random ramblings - (almost) concluded.
except i do have one final thing to say:
8) my friend-whom-i-have-never-met, Barry, paid me the highest compliment a few weeks ago (see the comments section of his post). when i first "met" Barry, he was blogging at Honest Faith. now he blogs at Atheos (Godless). both blogs are well worth your time, regardless of what you believe.
2012: Shifting Into A New Reality
Doesn't that sound trendy? ;)
Believe me, I titled this post tongue-in-cheek, thinking about how "culturally relevant" it sounded - but God willing, it's not quite as full of hot air as it could be. :)
I read one of the most incredibly profound books while I was flying to and from the East Coast over the holidays, and I hope that if you get a chance, you will go to your nearest local bookstore and order a copy (if they don't already have it in stock). It's called SHIFT, by Peter Arnell. I could summarize it for you, but I think Peter does a way better job of it himself:
For a number of reasons, towards the end of 2011, I found myself increasingly un-Happy. Part of it, honestly, was just imbalance on my part - being too busy, being busy doing the wrong things, not having enough downtime to meet the needs of my inner introvert, and accidentally but subconsciously beginning to identify myself by what I do, and not by Whose I am. Reading Peter's book was inspiring and timely and as far as I can tell, God-orchestrated. (I mean, really - what was I doing in the business section of Barnes and Noble?! How did I end up there?!) Lol.
I came away from reading this book confident of two things: 1) change is possible; and 2) I'm going to need some help.
There are a lot of things in my life that I wish would just shift by themselves.
They're not going to.
If I want to see things change, I'm going to have to do something.
Some of the negatives are circumstances that I simply cannot do anything about, except pray. Only God can move those mountains, and if/when He's ready to, He will. But there are things I can change. Things I can control. Things I can do.
So as I took my annual beginning of the year retreat to finish Peter's book and pray over this coming year, here are the things I've determined that I would like to either see shift or to see God do in me, as we stand at this year's annual crossroads, choose a path and start walking into 2012:
1) I want to be more present.
- Paying attention to the moment.
- Really listening to people.
- Enjoying what I'm eating, and stopping when I'm full.
- Noticing nature; taking time to look at the stars.
2) I want to be more silent.
- Listening to what I'm actually thinking, and what it reveals about my heart.
- Listening for His voice; learning to know Him better.
3) I want to be more intentionally grateful.
- I need to write it down: what am I thankful for today?
4) I want to make some personal shifts in how I structure my lifestyle:
- Diet: I need to eat things that are good for me, that promote health.
- Exercise: I need to try to exercise at least 2x a week (if not more).
- Image: I've always wanted to dress with a little more style. This is my year to do a little bit of shopping - to buy clothes that flatter and fit. I will always be most comfortable in jeans and a sweatshirt, but as I start to eat better and exercise more, I know from experience that I will feel more confident, and I want to look it. I can't go nuts; my debt-reduction plan needs to stay in place - but I need to give myself permission to look nice. And I needed a new haircut. Which I got today. (And I feel fabulous.) :)
5) I want to read and study more. (Leadership books and stories.)
6) I want to write more. And maybe finally take the risk and see if I can sell it.
7) I want to go deeper with Jesus, and fall more in love with Him than I have ever been.
- Listen. Pray. Fast. Wait. Worship.
- Dwell in the shelter of the Most High.
- Walk into my calling.
- Live with purpose. Live with joy.
So that's the new reality; at least, it's what I'm hoping for this year. I don't know when/how/what it will all look like - but because He is with me on this journey, I know it's going to be full of adventure and fun and learning and grace, and an experience far greater than anything I can imagine now.
Please feel free to check in with me from time to time, and ask me how it's going. And go read the book. You won't regret it. :)
Happy New Year, friends. Be blessed.
Believe me, I titled this post tongue-in-cheek, thinking about how "culturally relevant" it sounded - but God willing, it's not quite as full of hot air as it could be. :)
I read one of the most incredibly profound books while I was flying to and from the East Coast over the holidays, and I hope that if you get a chance, you will go to your nearest local bookstore and order a copy (if they don't already have it in stock). It's called SHIFT, by Peter Arnell. I could summarize it for you, but I think Peter does a way better job of it himself:
For a number of reasons, towards the end of 2011, I found myself increasingly un-Happy. Part of it, honestly, was just imbalance on my part - being too busy, being busy doing the wrong things, not having enough downtime to meet the needs of my inner introvert, and accidentally but subconsciously beginning to identify myself by what I do, and not by Whose I am. Reading Peter's book was inspiring and timely and as far as I can tell, God-orchestrated. (I mean, really - what was I doing in the business section of Barnes and Noble?! How did I end up there?!) Lol.
I came away from reading this book confident of two things: 1) change is possible; and 2) I'm going to need some help.
There are a lot of things in my life that I wish would just shift by themselves.
They're not going to.
If I want to see things change, I'm going to have to do something.
Some of the negatives are circumstances that I simply cannot do anything about, except pray. Only God can move those mountains, and if/when He's ready to, He will. But there are things I can change. Things I can control. Things I can do.
So as I took my annual beginning of the year retreat to finish Peter's book and pray over this coming year, here are the things I've determined that I would like to either see shift or to see God do in me, as we stand at this year's annual crossroads, choose a path and start walking into 2012:
1) I want to be more present.
- Paying attention to the moment.
- Really listening to people.
- Enjoying what I'm eating, and stopping when I'm full.
- Noticing nature; taking time to look at the stars.
2) I want to be more silent.
- Listening to what I'm actually thinking, and what it reveals about my heart.
- Listening for His voice; learning to know Him better.
3) I want to be more intentionally grateful.
- I need to write it down: what am I thankful for today?
4) I want to make some personal shifts in how I structure my lifestyle:
- Diet: I need to eat things that are good for me, that promote health.
- Exercise: I need to try to exercise at least 2x a week (if not more).
- Image: I've always wanted to dress with a little more style. This is my year to do a little bit of shopping - to buy clothes that flatter and fit. I will always be most comfortable in jeans and a sweatshirt, but as I start to eat better and exercise more, I know from experience that I will feel more confident, and I want to look it. I can't go nuts; my debt-reduction plan needs to stay in place - but I need to give myself permission to look nice. And I needed a new haircut. Which I got today. (And I feel fabulous.) :)
5) I want to read and study more. (Leadership books and stories.)
6) I want to write more. And maybe finally take the risk and see if I can sell it.
7) I want to go deeper with Jesus, and fall more in love with Him than I have ever been.
- Listen. Pray. Fast. Wait. Worship.
- Dwell in the shelter of the Most High.
- Walk into my calling.
- Live with purpose. Live with joy.
So that's the new reality; at least, it's what I'm hoping for this year. I don't know when/how/what it will all look like - but because He is with me on this journey, I know it's going to be full of adventure and fun and learning and grace, and an experience far greater than anything I can imagine now.
Please feel free to check in with me from time to time, and ask me how it's going. And go read the book. You won't regret it. :)
Happy New Year, friends. Be blessed.
Book Review: Sabbath by Dan B. Allender
Dan B. Allender's book on Sabbath explores the Biblical mandate for Sabbath-keeping by looking at the biblical text themselves, exploring some of the history around how God's people have traditionally and creatively celebrated the Sabbath over time, and sharing his own experience with the discipline/joy of keeping the Sabbath. His mission from the very beginning of the book is to dispel both the rule-bound, legalistic perspective and the laissez-faire, "oh-that's-just-the-Old-Covenant" perspective on the Fourth Commandment, and to transform them into a new, joyful anticipation of what the Jews have long referred to as "the Queen of days." (And he succeeded.)
I was encouraged by literally every chapter in the book to rethink my perspective on Sabbath, and to see it not just as a day of rest in which I do absolutely nothing except whatever I feel like doing or as a day off to catch up on housework and run errands, but as a day during which God's kingdom come and coming can and should be experienced more fully. I've taken Allender up on a number of his challenges over the past few months: I've taken a walk with an "enemy" - I've stopped completely retreating from the world and begun to invite people over for dinner - and I've started to plan a little more carefully for the day. Sabbath is no longer just a stopping place at the end of a long week for me, but a deliberate pause in which to celebrate with Him and spend quality time in His word and with His people, enjoying creation, freedom, and time - and looking forward to eternity.
I would highly recommend this book to anyone who's willing to have their life - and perspective - rocked a bit. My response to this book was to literally change the way I structure my time - and it's been an incredibly life-giving change.
Disclosure in agreement with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising": I received this book for free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.
random ramblings, vol. 10
I'm cleaning my house tonight. (Can you tell?) lol. Cleaning is not one of my favorite activities, particularly for hours on end (which is what truly cleaning my apartment would entail at this point) - so while I'm procrastinating (something I'm quite talented at doing), here are seven more random ramblings from Happyland:
1) I have about a week to put together a "life vision" presentation for JAA (a leadership/learning "book club" sort of group). I'm contemplating presenting it creatively - a map of Happyland, complete with playgrounds, diners, and churches. I'm not sure I can draw it very well, though. I also honestly am not sure I know what my life vision is. I know bits and pieces of who I am and where I'm going, but if there's anything I've learned over my past few years of blogging, it's that life is a journey, and who we are is as much about who we're becoming as who we've been - and we don't always see it clearly for ourselves. So here's an invitation to the peanut gallery (lurkers and regular commentators alike): what do you see? What are the major themes in my life? What are my gifts, my focuses (foci?)? I have some ideas (I will share them later, when I'm done writing/drawing my vision) - but from those of you who don't know me in "real life" (aka we've only met through blogging), I'd love to know what you see, just from what I write (and I'd love to hear from those of you who do know me in real life as well!).
2) My current playlist on iTunes is pretty eclectic. (surprise, surprise) In no particular order, I'm currently hooked on these songs:
Stuck Like Glue - by Sugarland
What If: Celtic Mix - by Emilie Autumn
and pretty much everything Chris Ayer ever wrote, but especially Lost and Found, The Revealing, Pretty Poison Things, and Warmer
3) Lauren Winner, in Mudhouse Sabbath, writes about hospitality as welcoming people into your life "as is." I still find this challenging - but on the evening before a friend arrives to visit for half a week, I am looking around my disaster of an apartment, and realizing that it's just not all going to get done. It's almost ten, and I have to get up at five tomorrow. I'll have a few hours between church and the time I have to leave to pick her up from the airport, but chances are good that not all the cleaning that "ought" to be done will be. I'm going to have to settle for getting the dust bunnies out of the corners, and worry about the dust on the bookshelves later. Sigh. But this is a friend of my heart, and she knows firsthand what it's like to be a working single woman - and that I have two jobs - so things that can slide (like dusting) tend to slide. She's going to love me whether I remember to dust or not.
4) Update on the on-going Sabbath journey: today was definitely unorthodox. ;) There were very real elements of "traditional" Sabbath present: I slept in a bit (rested), shared a meal with a good friend, celebrated the reality that everything broken will be set right some day. I read a good book. I spent time outside. I listened to great music. I was at peace.
I also took a bunch of stuff to Goodwill and went grocery shopping. I cleaned out my car and vacuumed it. I wiped down a bunch of storage bins that have been collecting dust in the garage and loaded them into my car to donate to my church tomorrow (the creative planning team has acquired a lot of odds and ends over the past two years, and is in need of organization). I did a couple loads of laundry, and my dishes. I cooked dinner. I started cleaning my room, and organized my linen closet and my pantry. I also checked my email and did some work for church.
Everything in that last paragraph is "work" - which is forbidden on the Sabbath. And I wouldn't recommend it as normal Sabbath-keeping behaviour. But on the eve of a week-long stay-cation when I know I will be getting a good deal more rest than I usually do, and in the wake of a long stretch of insane busyness where lots of my own personal stuff (things like cleaning out my car and my linen closet) has fallen by the wayside - getting that stuff done was incredibly freeing today. And the best thing about it was that it wasn't "work" - it was fun, being productive - kind of like not being productive right now is also fun. :)
5) I'm reading a book for JAA called Necessary Endings by Dr. Henry Cloud. I'm developing a bit of a love/hate relationship with this book. It's good stuff - but challenging - and I'm finding as I read that I have a really hard time letting go of things/people/seasons. Some of it is loyalty taken to extremes. Some of it is just clinging to good memories and not allowing myself to create new ones. I remember Chris calling me out a few years ago on being too attached to my memories of The Vine to fully embrace what God was doing in me and in our ministry at the time. I think there's a degree to which I still haven't let that go entirely. It was a good season, those five years it lasted. I learned a lot, grew a lot, met a lot of people who are still very dear to me. But this season I'm in now is also good - and I need to embrace it without looking back. Maybe that's one of the lessons we're to learn from Lot's wife - crying over what's past won't leave us with anything but a pillar of salt, once the water's evaporated from our tears. We need to look forward, and embrace our futures, however unknown they may currently be.
6) That said - there's something to be said for meaningful nostalgia. I am currently listening to Hootie and the Blowfish as I type. Whatever happened to them?
7) My current read is Sarah Ban Breathnach's Peace and Plenty. I am reading it slowly, and taking notes. It's the first book on finances I've ever read that deals with the emotional component of becoming financially responsible after you've completely screwed it up. Chock full of good advice and quotations and practical applications, it's become one of those books I can't help but view as a friend. I'm finding a lot of life in its pages - and learning to appreciate things like cucumber water as the luxuries they are. :)
1) I have about a week to put together a "life vision" presentation for JAA (a leadership/learning "book club" sort of group). I'm contemplating presenting it creatively - a map of Happyland, complete with playgrounds, diners, and churches. I'm not sure I can draw it very well, though. I also honestly am not sure I know what my life vision is. I know bits and pieces of who I am and where I'm going, but if there's anything I've learned over my past few years of blogging, it's that life is a journey, and who we are is as much about who we're becoming as who we've been - and we don't always see it clearly for ourselves. So here's an invitation to the peanut gallery (lurkers and regular commentators alike): what do you see? What are the major themes in my life? What are my gifts, my focuses (foci?)? I have some ideas (I will share them later, when I'm done writing/drawing my vision) - but from those of you who don't know me in "real life" (aka we've only met through blogging), I'd love to know what you see, just from what I write (and I'd love to hear from those of you who do know me in real life as well!).
2) My current playlist on iTunes is pretty eclectic. (surprise, surprise) In no particular order, I'm currently hooked on these songs:
Stuck Like Glue - by Sugarland
What If: Celtic Mix - by Emilie Autumn
and pretty much everything Chris Ayer ever wrote, but especially Lost and Found, The Revealing, Pretty Poison Things, and Warmer
3) Lauren Winner, in Mudhouse Sabbath, writes about hospitality as welcoming people into your life "as is." I still find this challenging - but on the evening before a friend arrives to visit for half a week, I am looking around my disaster of an apartment, and realizing that it's just not all going to get done. It's almost ten, and I have to get up at five tomorrow. I'll have a few hours between church and the time I have to leave to pick her up from the airport, but chances are good that not all the cleaning that "ought" to be done will be. I'm going to have to settle for getting the dust bunnies out of the corners, and worry about the dust on the bookshelves later. Sigh. But this is a friend of my heart, and she knows firsthand what it's like to be a working single woman - and that I have two jobs - so things that can slide (like dusting) tend to slide. She's going to love me whether I remember to dust or not.
4) Update on the on-going Sabbath journey: today was definitely unorthodox. ;) There were very real elements of "traditional" Sabbath present: I slept in a bit (rested), shared a meal with a good friend, celebrated the reality that everything broken will be set right some day. I read a good book. I spent time outside. I listened to great music. I was at peace.
I also took a bunch of stuff to Goodwill and went grocery shopping. I cleaned out my car and vacuumed it. I wiped down a bunch of storage bins that have been collecting dust in the garage and loaded them into my car to donate to my church tomorrow (the creative planning team has acquired a lot of odds and ends over the past two years, and is in need of organization). I did a couple loads of laundry, and my dishes. I cooked dinner. I started cleaning my room, and organized my linen closet and my pantry. I also checked my email and did some work for church.
Everything in that last paragraph is "work" - which is forbidden on the Sabbath. And I wouldn't recommend it as normal Sabbath-keeping behaviour. But on the eve of a week-long stay-cation when I know I will be getting a good deal more rest than I usually do, and in the wake of a long stretch of insane busyness where lots of my own personal stuff (things like cleaning out my car and my linen closet) has fallen by the wayside - getting that stuff done was incredibly freeing today. And the best thing about it was that it wasn't "work" - it was fun, being productive - kind of like not being productive right now is also fun. :)
5) I'm reading a book for JAA called Necessary Endings by Dr. Henry Cloud. I'm developing a bit of a love/hate relationship with this book. It's good stuff - but challenging - and I'm finding as I read that I have a really hard time letting go of things/people/seasons. Some of it is loyalty taken to extremes. Some of it is just clinging to good memories and not allowing myself to create new ones. I remember Chris calling me out a few years ago on being too attached to my memories of The Vine to fully embrace what God was doing in me and in our ministry at the time. I think there's a degree to which I still haven't let that go entirely. It was a good season, those five years it lasted. I learned a lot, grew a lot, met a lot of people who are still very dear to me. But this season I'm in now is also good - and I need to embrace it without looking back. Maybe that's one of the lessons we're to learn from Lot's wife - crying over what's past won't leave us with anything but a pillar of salt, once the water's evaporated from our tears. We need to look forward, and embrace our futures, however unknown they may currently be.
6) That said - there's something to be said for meaningful nostalgia. I am currently listening to Hootie and the Blowfish as I type. Whatever happened to them?
7) My current read is Sarah Ban Breathnach's Peace and Plenty. I am reading it slowly, and taking notes. It's the first book on finances I've ever read that deals with the emotional component of becoming financially responsible after you've completely screwed it up. Chock full of good advice and quotations and practical applications, it's become one of those books I can't help but view as a friend. I'm finding a lot of life in its pages - and learning to appreciate things like cucumber water as the luxuries they are. :)
random ramblings, vol. 9
it's late, but one mocha coconut frappuccino six hours ago might seem to be responsible for that. (there are definitely drawbacks to living largely decaffeinated.) which could have been item number one for this week's edition of random ramblings, but it isn't. (you just get that pointer for free.) ;) so without further ado - MORE random ramblings:
1) i've lately become completely addicted to YA fiction. there are some really good books out there right now. if i ever have the privilege of having daughters, a book i read this week (which i am ashamed to say i almost didn't bring home because of the cover picture - it's a little scary) will be assigned reading during their teenage years. written by a children's librarian (who are, btw, some of the most under-appreciated but most influential teachers of any child's life), this book is a MUST-READ for any girl junior-high or older AND their moms. set in feudal times and dealing with the fantasy world of mermaids vs/and islanders, it subtly but powerfully deals with coming-of-age issues, managing peer pressure, the importance of character over popularity, and self-esteem. all while creating an incredibly believable, historically accurate picture of the feudal system. it was amazing. and the cause of a very short night of sleep this week. i've GOT to stop picking up new stories at night....
(like that's going to happen...)
2) Madeleine L'Engle is still my hero. i'm reading Walking On Water this week, and again, learning so much from her about my faith, art, their interplay, and myself. i cannot wait to spend countless hours in eternity talking with this amazing saint, and am so grateful to her for her transparency and wisdom in all her books, both fiction and non-fiction. her writing and what i've learned from it is part of why i dare to write anything at all, ever. i would have given so much for one meal with her at Crosswicks. someday...
3) i am a horrible correspondent. this is something with which i am slowly coming to terms. i currently have at least EIGHT people who are waiting for long newsy letters. (some of you are among them.) they're coming, really. REALLY. it's just that i can't write shallow personal letters. i suck at them. (and it takes a lot of emotional energy - and time - to produce a non-shallow letter.) so when it finally shows up in your inbox, brace yourself. and schedule at least 1/2 an hour to read it. :) (and if you're not on that list and want one, please leave a comment with your email address. i suggest using the so-and-so (at) such-and-such (dot) com methodology, to avoid spam from web-crawling whatnot. i will add you to the list.) ;) For those of you who ARE on the list already - I promise, I haven't forgotten!!!
4) have i mentioned lately that i'm glad it's summer? there are so many things i am grateful for with the advent of summer:
- a slower pace of life (Thank You, JESUS!!!!)
- sunshine (why do i live in the mid-west again? oh, right. summer)
- road-trips. most notably to Michigan and BFFs in Indiana. plus a variety of others.
5) Sabbath. on-going learning process. on-going revelation. on-going quest. i began a new phase of it today. one of the dimensions of Sabbath which i find to be sorely lacking but incredibly important to/in my life is the dimension of community. the Sabbath was meant to be celebrated together. and to that end, hospitality - which is one of my gifts, but one i do not engage enough - is something i need/want to amp up, especially on Saturdays (my current Sabbath day). so, unto that end - i am investing in new dishes. i know that might sound silly, but the truth of the matter is, a well-set table isn't snobbery to me - it's investment. it's visible proof to my dinner guests that "i'm glad you're here." i'm not going all-out right away - but once a month, i've given myself permission to ditch a few more pieces of the $2 dishes i once owned (but of which i have now succeeded in breaking the majority) in favor of slightly more pricey dinner dishes. i bought 4 dinner plates today. June's purchase will be 4 dessert plates. July's: a 2-tier serving dish. etc. until i have beautiful place-settings and serving dishes for four. (which is all my current table can seat - down the road, that will change, too, i hope!!!) and in the meantime, i intend to (at least once a month) have people over for dinner. which requires cleaning my apartment. which is also on the task list for this weekend. ;)
6) i'm pretty sure that frappuccino is finally wearing off... (yay! just in time for Saturday....) ;)
7) if financial stewardship has EVER been something with which you've wrestled (or especially if it's something you wrestle with now), PLEASE: check out Andy Stanley's podcasts for "Balanced" - via Northpoint Ministries (dot) org. (also available on iTunes). Andy's wisdom is straight from the Lord and from His Word - and most definitely worth pursuing.
So there you have it. Random Ramblings, vol. 9. and on that note - good night! :)
1) i've lately become completely addicted to YA fiction. there are some really good books out there right now. if i ever have the privilege of having daughters, a book i read this week (which i am ashamed to say i almost didn't bring home because of the cover picture - it's a little scary) will be assigned reading during their teenage years. written by a children's librarian (who are, btw, some of the most under-appreciated but most influential teachers of any child's life), this book is a MUST-READ for any girl junior-high or older AND their moms. set in feudal times and dealing with the fantasy world of mermaids vs/and islanders, it subtly but powerfully deals with coming-of-age issues, managing peer pressure, the importance of character over popularity, and self-esteem. all while creating an incredibly believable, historically accurate picture of the feudal system. it was amazing. and the cause of a very short night of sleep this week. i've GOT to stop picking up new stories at night....
(like that's going to happen...)
2) Madeleine L'Engle is still my hero. i'm reading Walking On Water this week, and again, learning so much from her about my faith, art, their interplay, and myself. i cannot wait to spend countless hours in eternity talking with this amazing saint, and am so grateful to her for her transparency and wisdom in all her books, both fiction and non-fiction. her writing and what i've learned from it is part of why i dare to write anything at all, ever. i would have given so much for one meal with her at Crosswicks. someday...
3) i am a horrible correspondent. this is something with which i am slowly coming to terms. i currently have at least EIGHT people who are waiting for long newsy letters. (some of you are among them.) they're coming, really. REALLY. it's just that i can't write shallow personal letters. i suck at them. (and it takes a lot of emotional energy - and time - to produce a non-shallow letter.) so when it finally shows up in your inbox, brace yourself. and schedule at least 1/2 an hour to read it. :) (and if you're not on that list and want one, please leave a comment with your email address. i suggest using the so-and-so (at) such-and-such (dot) com methodology, to avoid spam from web-crawling whatnot. i will add you to the list.) ;) For those of you who ARE on the list already - I promise, I haven't forgotten!!!
4) have i mentioned lately that i'm glad it's summer? there are so many things i am grateful for with the advent of summer:
- a slower pace of life (Thank You, JESUS!!!!)
- sunshine (why do i live in the mid-west again? oh, right. summer)
- road-trips. most notably to Michigan and BFFs in Indiana. plus a variety of others.
5) Sabbath. on-going learning process. on-going revelation. on-going quest. i began a new phase of it today. one of the dimensions of Sabbath which i find to be sorely lacking but incredibly important to/in my life is the dimension of community. the Sabbath was meant to be celebrated together. and to that end, hospitality - which is one of my gifts, but one i do not engage enough - is something i need/want to amp up, especially on Saturdays (my current Sabbath day). so, unto that end - i am investing in new dishes. i know that might sound silly, but the truth of the matter is, a well-set table isn't snobbery to me - it's investment. it's visible proof to my dinner guests that "i'm glad you're here." i'm not going all-out right away - but once a month, i've given myself permission to ditch a few more pieces of the $2 dishes i once owned (but of which i have now succeeded in breaking the majority) in favor of slightly more pricey dinner dishes. i bought 4 dinner plates today. June's purchase will be 4 dessert plates. July's: a 2-tier serving dish. etc. until i have beautiful place-settings and serving dishes for four. (which is all my current table can seat - down the road, that will change, too, i hope!!!) and in the meantime, i intend to (at least once a month) have people over for dinner. which requires cleaning my apartment. which is also on the task list for this weekend. ;)
6) i'm pretty sure that frappuccino is finally wearing off... (yay! just in time for Saturday....) ;)
7) if financial stewardship has EVER been something with which you've wrestled (or especially if it's something you wrestle with now), PLEASE: check out Andy Stanley's podcasts for "Balanced" - via Northpoint Ministries (dot) org. (also available on iTunes). Andy's wisdom is straight from the Lord and from His Word - and most definitely worth pursuing.
So there you have it. Random Ramblings, vol. 9. and on that note - good night! :)
random ramblings, vol. 8
How is it possible that it's been a month since I've written anything? I knew it had been awhile, but wow. The past few weeks have been absolutely crazy - lots of demands on my time at work (and outside of work!), with very little down time that has corresponded with coherency. But that season is almost over. Three more weeks, and summer officially begins. My days will still be full, but not quite so crazily paced, and I am grateful for the coming respite. In the meantime, another edition of random ramblings:
1) It's Kentucky Derby Day, and while I generally prefer sunshine to cloud cover, I'm actually almost glad it's not a beautiful sunshiny day. Staying indoors to watch/listen to pre-race coverage is harder when the weather's amazing. I like "Twice the Appeal." Hoping he wins. :)
2) I was unexpectedly given a gift yesterday: a canister of Azteca Fire tea from Teavana. It's chocolate and decaf and tea = bliss in a cup. Just opening the canister and smelling it makes me happy. Ah.....
3) My favorite farmer's market (here, anyway) opened last weekend. Yay!
4) I'm seriously looking forward to dinner tonight. I bought bok choy and spinach and zucchini and squash and baby broccoli at the grocery store last night, and am making a ginormous stir-fry. I realize that in true Sabbath keeping, I would have done the shopping Thursday night, and the cooking last night - but it didn't happen, and I like cooking (tho I don't like washing all the dishes that inevitably result from it), so it doesn't feel like work.
5) Sabbath keeping remains an ongoing, positive challenge in my spiritual walk. There a piece of it that might be slightly legalism-tainted - I want to figure out how to do it, and do it well, all the time - but it is so much less about rule-keeping than it is about communion and fellowship and rest and celebration. Preparation is key - remembering to order my days in a way that makes the Sabbath fully possible is one of the challenges I'm not meeting well - yet. The end of this busy season and the beginning of summer will help - and it is my hope to establish a new and better pattern that is sustainable long-term over the next few weeks. Falling into Sabbath so exhausted that it takes most of the day to start feeling like a real person again isn't the way this is supposed to go. But more on that in another post...
6) I have been reading, in the midst of this insane season, often when I ought to have been sleeping - somewhat voraciously. I've discovered new authors that I absolutely love - Julie Berry, E.D. Baker, and others - and picked up books I hadn't read yet from authors I already knew I loved. I haven't been able to bring myself to read Sunshine yet - I've never been comfy with vampire stories - but I read Robin McKinley's Deerskin this week, and it was hard to put down. It's sad - there's some really tough stuff in it, and years ago, I wouldn't have liked it at all - but it is also a story of hope and healing and love, and it ends justly and well. It may not make the re-read list as often as The Hero and the Crown or Spindle's End - but it's definitely one I will read again.
7) All the reading I've been doing is having a very positive effect. I am so much more me when I'm reading good stories. A good story is so much more than words on paper or a set of ideas in a logical order. It's art, and as such, demands that you interact with it, and becomes a part of your story - affecting you, influencing you, challenging you to define what you think and feel and why, and sometimes pushing you to understand things you didn't or didn't want to. (Deerskin did that for me - I think that's why I liked it so much: I learned some things about healing as I read.) Stories have always been central to how I learn and think and spend my time - and if I am reading, I find I am more centered. I don't know how to explain that, or why it is, but it is what it is - and I have felt, in spite of my tiredness, more myself over the past two weeks as I've been plowing through fantasy and faerie stories in time I didn't really have to spare. For all that I can logically say that getting a good night's sleep would have been a "wiser" use of time... I'm not 100% sure that it would have been. (Though both would have been awesome.) ;)
1) It's Kentucky Derby Day, and while I generally prefer sunshine to cloud cover, I'm actually almost glad it's not a beautiful sunshiny day. Staying indoors to watch/listen to pre-race coverage is harder when the weather's amazing. I like "Twice the Appeal." Hoping he wins. :)
2) I was unexpectedly given a gift yesterday: a canister of Azteca Fire tea from Teavana. It's chocolate and decaf and tea = bliss in a cup. Just opening the canister and smelling it makes me happy. Ah.....
3) My favorite farmer's market (here, anyway) opened last weekend. Yay!
4) I'm seriously looking forward to dinner tonight. I bought bok choy and spinach and zucchini and squash and baby broccoli at the grocery store last night, and am making a ginormous stir-fry. I realize that in true Sabbath keeping, I would have done the shopping Thursday night, and the cooking last night - but it didn't happen, and I like cooking (tho I don't like washing all the dishes that inevitably result from it), so it doesn't feel like work.
5) Sabbath keeping remains an ongoing, positive challenge in my spiritual walk. There a piece of it that might be slightly legalism-tainted - I want to figure out how to do it, and do it well, all the time - but it is so much less about rule-keeping than it is about communion and fellowship and rest and celebration. Preparation is key - remembering to order my days in a way that makes the Sabbath fully possible is one of the challenges I'm not meeting well - yet. The end of this busy season and the beginning of summer will help - and it is my hope to establish a new and better pattern that is sustainable long-term over the next few weeks. Falling into Sabbath so exhausted that it takes most of the day to start feeling like a real person again isn't the way this is supposed to go. But more on that in another post...
6) I have been reading, in the midst of this insane season, often when I ought to have been sleeping - somewhat voraciously. I've discovered new authors that I absolutely love - Julie Berry, E.D. Baker, and others - and picked up books I hadn't read yet from authors I already knew I loved. I haven't been able to bring myself to read Sunshine yet - I've never been comfy with vampire stories - but I read Robin McKinley's Deerskin this week, and it was hard to put down. It's sad - there's some really tough stuff in it, and years ago, I wouldn't have liked it at all - but it is also a story of hope and healing and love, and it ends justly and well. It may not make the re-read list as often as The Hero and the Crown or Spindle's End - but it's definitely one I will read again.
7) All the reading I've been doing is having a very positive effect. I am so much more me when I'm reading good stories. A good story is so much more than words on paper or a set of ideas in a logical order. It's art, and as such, demands that you interact with it, and becomes a part of your story - affecting you, influencing you, challenging you to define what you think and feel and why, and sometimes pushing you to understand things you didn't or didn't want to. (Deerskin did that for me - I think that's why I liked it so much: I learned some things about healing as I read.) Stories have always been central to how I learn and think and spend my time - and if I am reading, I find I am more centered. I don't know how to explain that, or why it is, but it is what it is - and I have felt, in spite of my tiredness, more myself over the past two weeks as I've been plowing through fantasy and faerie stories in time I didn't really have to spare. For all that I can logically say that getting a good night's sleep would have been a "wiser" use of time... I'm not 100% sure that it would have been. (Though both would have been awesome.) ;)
random ramblings, vol. 7
This poor blog has been so neglected of late... Time for a little bit of rambling, I think! Maybe a few updates too. So without further ado:
1. I haven't actually not been blogging. I have a half-dozen unpublished posts/ideas of posts that I would really like to finish at some point. :) Most of them about Sabbath and/or healing. Stay tuned - one of these days I really will finish writing them!
2. I am craving bacon and feta cheese at the moment. Actually, craving might be an understatement...
3. The Lenten Daily Devotional Study that I'm doing with my church is going really well. I think I'm glad in retrospect that we didn't try to do the Lenten Supper thing along with it - as awesome as that would have been, it would have been one thing too many this spring. But the devotional itself has been getting a lot of good press - and in fact, morphed from being an email sent to people on a daily basis to also being posted on our pastor's blog. If you're interested in joining us, you can hop in at any time here.
4. Spring is finally springing. Can I just tell you how happy this makes me? I spent part of my Sabbath on Saturday walking in the woods, and it was wonderful.
5. After a few adventures (I believe it might have gone pseudo-missing at least twice), the podcast from the sermon I preached in February is finally up! :) There are a few little audio blips (sorry about that) - but most of the message made it!
6. I stayed up ridiculously late last night, finishing Robin McKinley's new book, Pegasus. The first couple of chapters were a little slow, but once I got into it, I could hardly put it down. It is an incredible, well-written, beautiful and insightful story. The protagonist is probably one of my new favorite characters ever. I really hope there's going to be a sequel, tho, and soon! The ending was terrible. Not unexpected - but still. I kept waiting for the last-minute save, and it never happened. :(
7. I also bought Rob Bell's new book, Love Wins. Definitely looking forward to reading it this week! I intended to read it on Saturday, but I started Pegasus first. And that was the end of that plan... :)
1. I haven't actually not been blogging. I have a half-dozen unpublished posts/ideas of posts that I would really like to finish at some point. :) Most of them about Sabbath and/or healing. Stay tuned - one of these days I really will finish writing them!
2. I am craving bacon and feta cheese at the moment. Actually, craving might be an understatement...
3. The Lenten Daily Devotional Study that I'm doing with my church is going really well. I think I'm glad in retrospect that we didn't try to do the Lenten Supper thing along with it - as awesome as that would have been, it would have been one thing too many this spring. But the devotional itself has been getting a lot of good press - and in fact, morphed from being an email sent to people on a daily basis to also being posted on our pastor's blog. If you're interested in joining us, you can hop in at any time here.
4. Spring is finally springing. Can I just tell you how happy this makes me? I spent part of my Sabbath on Saturday walking in the woods, and it was wonderful.
5. After a few adventures (I believe it might have gone pseudo-missing at least twice), the podcast from the sermon I preached in February is finally up! :) There are a few little audio blips (sorry about that) - but most of the message made it!
6. I stayed up ridiculously late last night, finishing Robin McKinley's new book, Pegasus. The first couple of chapters were a little slow, but once I got into it, I could hardly put it down. It is an incredible, well-written, beautiful and insightful story. The protagonist is probably one of my new favorite characters ever. I really hope there's going to be a sequel, tho, and soon! The ending was terrible. Not unexpected - but still. I kept waiting for the last-minute save, and it never happened. :(
7. I also bought Rob Bell's new book, Love Wins. Definitely looking forward to reading it this week! I intended to read it on Saturday, but I started Pegasus first. And that was the end of that plan... :)
an adjective-defying experience
i realize there's a bit of irony in using the compound adjective "adjective-defying" to describe my experience this weekend... but i'm not sure there really is just one word that would work. "awesome" doesn't quite touch it - tho it's close.
i went "home" this weekend. home to a place where i now know very few people, home to a place that still brings me so much comfort and safety just by being in it. i cheered (literally, out loud) when i crossed the Michigan border, and i kid you not, at one point about an hour later, i suddenly realized that i'd been grinning like an idiot for awhile... :)
i spent two glorious days in a luxury, eco-friendly hotel.
i ate - and ate - and ate! - amazing food: scrambled eggs, bacon, roasted potatoes, rye toast, flatbread pizza LOADED with feta and kalamata olives, chicken corn chowder, minestrone, fish and chips.
i had red wine and orange juice and hot buttered rum (my favorite espresso drink at the best coffee shop in the world). i had an amazing cup of french-press coffee.
i spent time with two dear friends i haven't seen in years.
i worshiped with them and with some other friends at a church that has grown astronomically since the last time i was there.
i listened to beautiful music - classical, pop, worship, Irish (in the Irish pub where i had the fish and chips), and folk.
and i read. an entire book. cover to cover. and it changed my life. is changing. will change.
there are no words that could ever completely describe these two days spent doing all these amazing, blessed and life-altering things with the Lord - but here are a few that just begin to get at it:
beautiful. wonderful. tough. amazing. unexpected. lovely. abundant. peaceful. right. true. dangerous. blessed. intimate. challenging. restful. pure. long. short. (far too short.) lonely. communal. lush. restorative. informative. formative. social. sweet. transformative.
i'm sure there are others that describe it as well.
i hope to be able to unpack some of it over the next few weeks. stay tuned.
and in the meantime: go buy yourself a copy of Dan Allender's Sabbath... i won't tell you that it will change your life. but it did change mine. and it's a good book.
random ramblings, vol. 6
It's been awhile since I've written a rambling post, so since I'm procrastinating on any number of other things I ought to be doing, here you are. :) Seven random facts that have relatively nothing to do with anything.
1. Today was one of the most decidedly non-Sabbathy Sabbaths I've had in a really long time. I'm actually strangely glad to say that - mostly because it means that I've had a Sabbath on a weekly basis for a while now. But I'm feeling it this evening, the lack of Sabbath. I had literally a dozen errands to run today, things I just haven't had time to do; I managed to fit in nine of them before deciding the other three could wait. And actually, now that I've said that, I can't even remember what one of the remaining three was.... Anyway. All of that is to say that life has been incredibly fast-paced of late. Which makes me really happy about Random Rambling #2.
2. I'm going on vacation. :) Totally impromptu (well, somewhat planned, as I made reservations two days ago, but still... it wasn't on the calendar until last week!). It's just for a weekend, but I can't wait. Two days, mostly me and Jesus, in one of my favorite places. I have a rare Sunday off from Torch next week, and I'm looking forward to spending time in worship with some dear friends I haven't seen in far too long.
3. You know you're involved in church service planning when you evaluate the risk of buying a movie you've never seen before by factoring in whether or not the production company is included under your church's CVLI license... just in case there's a sermon illustration in there somewhere.
4. I haven't seen "Ladies in Lavender" or "A Room with a View" in far too long. I should fix that...
5. I have entirely too many unread books on my shelves. I wish I had time to fix that, too....
6. I'm looking for a really good Lenten devotional guide. Does anyone have one to recommend?
7. I'm sorry to say that my kitchen table is, once again, cluttered with unopened mail, mostly of the unwanted variety. I'm hoping to get to it tomorrow, but the good news is, I have a good friend coming over on Thursday, which will necessitate cleaning before then. :) One of these days, I really am going to get a handle on this.... And okay, I will just confess. I started a new box for that sort of thing somewhere around Christmas. But it is GOING DOWN by the end of February. Really. Mostly because I need that box for other things...
So there you have it. Seven random ramblings. Merry Christmas.
I suppose one of these days I should also take down my tree.....
1. Today was one of the most decidedly non-Sabbathy Sabbaths I've had in a really long time. I'm actually strangely glad to say that - mostly because it means that I've had a Sabbath on a weekly basis for a while now. But I'm feeling it this evening, the lack of Sabbath. I had literally a dozen errands to run today, things I just haven't had time to do; I managed to fit in nine of them before deciding the other three could wait. And actually, now that I've said that, I can't even remember what one of the remaining three was.... Anyway. All of that is to say that life has been incredibly fast-paced of late. Which makes me really happy about Random Rambling #2.
2. I'm going on vacation. :) Totally impromptu (well, somewhat planned, as I made reservations two days ago, but still... it wasn't on the calendar until last week!). It's just for a weekend, but I can't wait. Two days, mostly me and Jesus, in one of my favorite places. I have a rare Sunday off from Torch next week, and I'm looking forward to spending time in worship with some dear friends I haven't seen in far too long.
3. You know you're involved in church service planning when you evaluate the risk of buying a movie you've never seen before by factoring in whether or not the production company is included under your church's CVLI license... just in case there's a sermon illustration in there somewhere.
4. I haven't seen "Ladies in Lavender" or "A Room with a View" in far too long. I should fix that...
5. I have entirely too many unread books on my shelves. I wish I had time to fix that, too....
6. I'm looking for a really good Lenten devotional guide. Does anyone have one to recommend?
7. I'm sorry to say that my kitchen table is, once again, cluttered with unopened mail, mostly of the unwanted variety. I'm hoping to get to it tomorrow, but the good news is, I have a good friend coming over on Thursday, which will necessitate cleaning before then. :) One of these days, I really am going to get a handle on this.... And okay, I will just confess. I started a new box for that sort of thing somewhere around Christmas. But it is GOING DOWN by the end of February. Really. Mostly because I need that box for other things...
So there you have it. Seven random ramblings. Merry Christmas.
I suppose one of these days I should also take down my tree.....
Book Review: The Heart Mender, by Andy Andrews
Andy Andrews' The Heart Mender is an inspiring story about the power not just of love, but of forgiveness, community and faith. Intertwined with the love story of an American woman and a German soldier during World War II (and with the stories of their friends and neighbors) is a bit of the author's own story, as he uncovers the clues that lead him to discover the romance.
Andrews is a skilled storyteller, and weaves dialogue and description to create vivid and believable characters. The issues with which the characters struggle are real, and the answers to which they come are hard-won - but throughout the book is a firm and unyielding hope and confidence that love will, in the end, triumph. From beginning to end, the storylines illustrate the truth that bitterness and resentment do nothing but continue to wound, while making the choice to forgive can do everything towards bringing healing and hope to a broken heart.
One of the things I most appreciated about this story is that while it is a love story, it doesn't happen in isolation. It blossoms in the context of a community, and affects - and is affected by - that community. I love that. It makes the entire book feel even more true - because in real life, relationships do inevitably happen in the context of community.
I absolutely loved this story. I have actually read it twice now, and already loaned it to a friend. So I am happy to say that Thomas Nelson actually sent me an extra copy to give away on my blog! :) If you're intrigued and would like to read it, please let me know by commenting below. Your names will be entered in a drawing, which will take place a week from Saturday.
Disclosure in agreement with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising": I received this book for free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.
Andrews is a skilled storyteller, and weaves dialogue and description to create vivid and believable characters. The issues with which the characters struggle are real, and the answers to which they come are hard-won - but throughout the book is a firm and unyielding hope and confidence that love will, in the end, triumph. From beginning to end, the storylines illustrate the truth that bitterness and resentment do nothing but continue to wound, while making the choice to forgive can do everything towards bringing healing and hope to a broken heart.
One of the things I most appreciated about this story is that while it is a love story, it doesn't happen in isolation. It blossoms in the context of a community, and affects - and is affected by - that community. I love that. It makes the entire book feel even more true - because in real life, relationships do inevitably happen in the context of community.
I absolutely loved this story. I have actually read it twice now, and already loaned it to a friend. So I am happy to say that Thomas Nelson actually sent me an extra copy to give away on my blog! :) If you're intrigued and would like to read it, please let me know by commenting below. Your names will be entered in a drawing, which will take place a week from Saturday.
Disclosure in agreement with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising": I received this book for free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.
waiting. quietly, but with great joy...
It's almost here!
Tomorrow is the first day of Advent, and I have been waiting for this moment for almost two months. No, actually, more like eleven and a half months.... I love Advent.
Some of my best childhood memories are centered around Advent. Decorating the banisters of our New England church sanctuary with real evergreens and red ribbons and candles and a Christmas tree so tall you could barely see the top from the floor. Replacing the green banners of Ordinary Time on the pulpit with the rich purple hues of Advent. Taking a break for soup and crackers with the church family, and eating out of the church's fine china dishes. (Washing and drying all those dishes after lunch!) Making wreaths to take home and hang on our doors. Waking up every morning to open the next little door on the Advent calendar that hung on the cabinet in the kitchen. Watching the colored lights twinkle in our tree. Setting up the Nativity scene on the bookshelf. Putting out our Christmas decorations. Listening to Kenny and Dolly and Amy Grant and Alabama and Bing Crosby and Manheim Steamroller and countless others sing Christmas carols, back in the days when we had actual records and cassette tapes. Wrapping Christmas presents. Popping popcorn and watching Christmas movies. Lighting a candle every Sunday on the altar at church, marking one more theme celebrated, one week closer to Christmas. Wondering why the third candle is pink.
And FINALLY - Christmas Eve. Dressing up, leaving home in the dark. Caroling outside the church for an hour before service for the people passing by and coming to church. Caroling some more indoors. The beauty of the Christmas story read aloud. Hearing a soloist sing "O Holy Night" and hoping that someday I'd get to sing it (one day, finally, I did). Lighting the Christ candle, and then passing the light of Christ's love from candle to candle through our historic church sanctuary and singing Silent Night together acapella. Watching the familiar faces of friends and family shine with the mystery and beauty of it all as we ended our service in quietness, peace, and candlelit wonder.
And now that I'm older, this season has become even more special than the magical memories it held in my childhood. For now I understand, in a way I didn't then, what this season is really all about.
Advent is a season of waiting. A season of joy, hope, peace, love, wonder - and waiting, expectantly, for something to happen. It's the pathway, the journey to Christmas. And with Christmas, comes radiant, amazing, overwhelming love - in the form of a baby boy, born in a stable. The very Son of God, laid in a manger, here to experience all that we do - and to make a way back to God for us.
God waited a long time to send His Son. He waited for the perfect moment. But while He was waiting, He did some things. He wrote it in the stars, that this baby was coming. Remember the Magi, following that star? Think about the fact that light takes time to travel, and that what you see in the sky is actually something that happened a really, really, REALLY long time ago - and think for a moment: God put a star in the heavens that would point the way to His Son AGES before His Son would be born. Does the wonder of it floor you, even just a little bit? He also promised us that a Saviour would come - His prophets foretold His coming, and His people waited, too. And then, finally - He came. And He is coming again.
For these four weeks of Advent we wait. We remember. We hope, dream, imagine, wonder, experience the mystery that is the gift of God's Son, born in the city of David: Christ the Lord. We sing special songs - songs we sing once a year. We celebrate. We give gifts that echo, tho they could never compare with, the Gift that we've been given. We light candles.
We wait. Quietly, but with great joy.
Last year for Advent, my friend Amanda and I did a devotional study together with a book and a website called The Uncluttered Heart, by Beth A. Richardson. We loved it so much that we've invited our church family to go through it with us this year. Nineteen people have signed up so far! We are super-excited about this. :)
And if you want to join us, we'd love that, too. The Uncluttered Heart website has all the info you need to get started.
Hope to see you there!
and Happy Advent-Eve. :)
Tomorrow is the first day of Advent, and I have been waiting for this moment for almost two months. No, actually, more like eleven and a half months.... I love Advent.
Some of my best childhood memories are centered around Advent. Decorating the banisters of our New England church sanctuary with real evergreens and red ribbons and candles and a Christmas tree so tall you could barely see the top from the floor. Replacing the green banners of Ordinary Time on the pulpit with the rich purple hues of Advent. Taking a break for soup and crackers with the church family, and eating out of the church's fine china dishes. (Washing and drying all those dishes after lunch!) Making wreaths to take home and hang on our doors. Waking up every morning to open the next little door on the Advent calendar that hung on the cabinet in the kitchen. Watching the colored lights twinkle in our tree. Setting up the Nativity scene on the bookshelf. Putting out our Christmas decorations. Listening to Kenny and Dolly and Amy Grant and Alabama and Bing Crosby and Manheim Steamroller and countless others sing Christmas carols, back in the days when we had actual records and cassette tapes. Wrapping Christmas presents. Popping popcorn and watching Christmas movies. Lighting a candle every Sunday on the altar at church, marking one more theme celebrated, one week closer to Christmas. Wondering why the third candle is pink.
And FINALLY - Christmas Eve. Dressing up, leaving home in the dark. Caroling outside the church for an hour before service for the people passing by and coming to church. Caroling some more indoors. The beauty of the Christmas story read aloud. Hearing a soloist sing "O Holy Night" and hoping that someday I'd get to sing it (one day, finally, I did). Lighting the Christ candle, and then passing the light of Christ's love from candle to candle through our historic church sanctuary and singing Silent Night together acapella. Watching the familiar faces of friends and family shine with the mystery and beauty of it all as we ended our service in quietness, peace, and candlelit wonder.
And now that I'm older, this season has become even more special than the magical memories it held in my childhood. For now I understand, in a way I didn't then, what this season is really all about.
Advent is a season of waiting. A season of joy, hope, peace, love, wonder - and waiting, expectantly, for something to happen. It's the pathway, the journey to Christmas. And with Christmas, comes radiant, amazing, overwhelming love - in the form of a baby boy, born in a stable. The very Son of God, laid in a manger, here to experience all that we do - and to make a way back to God for us.
God waited a long time to send His Son. He waited for the perfect moment. But while He was waiting, He did some things. He wrote it in the stars, that this baby was coming. Remember the Magi, following that star? Think about the fact that light takes time to travel, and that what you see in the sky is actually something that happened a really, really, REALLY long time ago - and think for a moment: God put a star in the heavens that would point the way to His Son AGES before His Son would be born. Does the wonder of it floor you, even just a little bit? He also promised us that a Saviour would come - His prophets foretold His coming, and His people waited, too. And then, finally - He came. And He is coming again.
For these four weeks of Advent we wait. We remember. We hope, dream, imagine, wonder, experience the mystery that is the gift of God's Son, born in the city of David: Christ the Lord. We sing special songs - songs we sing once a year. We celebrate. We give gifts that echo, tho they could never compare with, the Gift that we've been given. We light candles.
We wait. Quietly, but with great joy.
Last year for Advent, my friend Amanda and I did a devotional study together with a book and a website called The Uncluttered Heart, by Beth A. Richardson. We loved it so much that we've invited our church family to go through it with us this year. Nineteen people have signed up so far! We are super-excited about this. :)
And if you want to join us, we'd love that, too. The Uncluttered Heart website has all the info you need to get started.
Hope to see you there!
and Happy Advent-Eve. :)
random ramblings, vol. 5
it's been over a year since my last post to the random ramblings series, so here you go: random ramblings, in no particular order of importance (if any).
1) did you know chaos is actually orderly? i'm pretty sure it's true. i read part of an entire book about it for my AP Calculus class in high school. and no, i can't recall a single time i've ever used anything else i learned in AP Calculus. (actually I can't recall much of anything else i learned in that class, either.) but i did retain that random fact, and one other: cauliflower is self-similar. if you don't believe me, go look at a head of cauliflower. every little piece of the cauliflower looks like a miniature version of the larger head of cauliflower.
i am pretty sure i've remembered this mostly because cauliflower is such a cool word. and i have a vague recollection of actually writing an entire philosophy of ministry paper using the self-similarity of cauliflower as a major introductory illustration. i don't remember what i argued or why, but i remember doing it.... if i ever find the paper, i may revisit this random rambling. :)
2) those of you who have been reading my blog for some time will be happy (i hope!) to note that (drum roll, please...): there is no longer a single (basket/ container/ drawer/ bag/ box/ what-have-you) of junk mail anywhere in my flat. (insert cheering noises here.) this has, unfortunately, had a negative impact on my kitchen table. but being as how i have people over every now and again, the pile tends to be eradicated at least once every two weeks, which, as you know, is a drastic improvement over times past. it's the little things in life... :)
3) i am sorry to report that i am once again not making coffee in the mornings. :( i love coffee. i love it dearly. but even decaf is not sitting well these days. sadness. (sniff) but yay for Mayan Chocolate Tea.
4) i am reading a book entitled Overcoming the Dark Side of Leadership (How To Become An Effective Leader by Confronting Potential Failures) by Gary L. McIntosh and Samuel D. Rima. (i'm reading it for a book-club-ish type small group.) it's actually not quite as gloom and doom as I feared from the title; lots of very interesting case studies.
but i'm about 3/4 of the way thru, and in the section you might consider "practical application," the authors are discussing the process by which you actually begin to deal with the darker side of your personality. they've gone to great lengths to explain that having a dark side is normal, and that it's just part of being human. now they're trying to take the edge off the fact that actually dealing with it can be (especially when you're starting out) a long and daunting, time-consuming, tough, emotional process - by explaining what the process doesn't entail.
And I quote:
the process does not require you to "utter cathartic screams of inner cleansing."
what does it say that I read that and felt disappointed? lol.
personally, i think sometimes all you need is one great big long cathartic scream of inner cleansing. it may not actually fix anything, but it IS actually somewhat cathartic. (read - it makes you feel better.) ;)
5) i have 22 lbs of apples in my kitchen, just waiting to be made into pies and applesauce. YUM.
6) my third annual road trip with Jesus was awesome. and it was in August. i am sorry i did not take pictures this year, but i will still try to write about it a bit - hopefully this weekend. :)
7) i sat in a chair at a local coffee shop tonight that was labelled (by my friend) as "an epic fail." who knew chairs could fail epically? but this one did. it looked like it was going to be an amazingly comfortable leather chair. the sort you just sink into and don't want to get out of. ever.
it wasn't.
reconciling with Oswald
My Utmost for His Highest.
I started reading it when I was in college, but found I disliked it, rather intensely. There was truth in it, but I felt so judged. So short of the mark. So I put it back on the shelf, where it collected dust, until finally I admitted to myself that I was only keeping it because it was reportedly part of any well-read Christian's library. I "wasn't ever going to read it" - so I gave it away, probably to Goodwill - maybe to a friend who wanted it - I have no idea. Either way, it's gone now.
And I'm finally, years later, a little bit sorry.
I listened to an audiobook this spring - David McCasland's Abandoned to God - a biography of Oswald Chambers. I have no idea what on earth possessed me to download it. Likely it was more that Someone in heaven prompted me to do it. It is one of the best books I have ever heard, and I am looking forward to someday owning a print copy to mark up. As the story neared the end, I found myself hoping that Oswald would not die, even though I knew he would. I was sad to come to the end of the book - it felt like losing a dear friend. I think I will likely listen to it again this summer - it was that good.
Oswald and I would have been friends, I think. He had a passion for seeing the arts restored to the church. He loved nothing better than long walks in the country and the company of good friends, talking about the Lord and His great love for us. He wrote some pretty amazing letters. He was funny. He loved music. He loved to travel. He learned to trust God through some very tight financial times. And he exercised his faith. Feeling undeniably called to it, Oswald and his wife once rented an enormous house to serve as a school - before they ever had a single student or a stick of furniture to put in it. Eventually, the Chambers and several of their students would serve overseas as missionaries in Egypt during the war. Oswald died there, of complications from appendicitis - and his wife, who had transcribed almost every message he had ever taught, devoted much of the rest of her life to publishing them. My Utmost for His Highest is actually a collection of short summaries from hour-long messages he preached to soldiers camped in Egypt. Knowing that, and knowing more of the adventurous, kind spirit behind the words, makes me want to read it again - for now I know that the man who spoke those words would never have spoken condemnation into anyone's life.
Oswald and his wife lived their life together by a very simple mission statement: "Trust God, and do the next thing." They dreamed often of what could be - prayed over those dreams, and asked the Lord for direction - but at the end of the day, even when they were certain of what God was calling them to (and when they were not), they left the future in His hands, and simply did what they knew was in front of them to do for that day. This seems to me to be a very wise way to live one's life.
My pastor told me recently that over the past few months he's watched me let go of what seemed at one time to be an almost desperate desire to know the "destination" (where are You calling me, God? and what am I supposed to do with my life?!) in favor of embracing the journey - the life lessons and joys of the here and now. It made me glad to see that what God began working in my life last fall was actually visible to someone else. I still have a lot of hopes and dreams for the future - many of which seem ridiculously unattainable - but I am less concerned than I used to be with how I will get there, or when, or even if - and much more concerned with living this life I've been given well. I do not always succeed at it; I have a remarkable gift for mucking things up sometimes. But I find myself more watchful for what today holds than I used to be. And it is good.
So today? Laundry. Dishes. Picking up a little. Going for a good long bike ride this afternoon. Cooking. Reading. Being at rest. And getting some stuff done for Torch tomorrow. It's our last week of a nine week sermon series, the staging for which involved a great many live plants, which I have been schlepping back and forth weekly. I am giving most of them away to any home that will take them, and looking forward to getting my windowsill back. It's the little things in life.... ;)
Book Review - Plan B, by Pete Wilson
Pete Wilson's book, Plan B, is ultimately about walking with God through the toughest parts of life. Wilson writes compassionately and honestly as he discusses the question that all of us, in various ways, face in the midst of pain and disillusionment: "God, where are You?"Wilson tells a lot of stories, from the Bible, from his own life, and from the lives of people he knows. It is evident that the compassion he feels as he writes comes from walking closely with a lot of people who have suffered through great heartache, and his constant encouragement throughout the book is to not give up, but to turn to the One who can help and heal us - and to trust Him with our lives.
I wanted to like this book; I really did. Unfortunately, I really had trouble getting my mind around the basic concept of the book. Just because things aren't going my way doesn't mean I'm stuck in some sort of "plan B" - which sounds to me like an inferior plan. The very "plan A" versus "plan B" analogy seems to me to walk some dangerous theological ground. Wilson did try to explain that by "plan B" he means that things aren't going the way we would have chosen - but what seems to us like "plan B" isn't a secondary plan to God at all, and I don't feel that Wilson explained that very clearly.
There is a lot of good truth in this book - I highly recommend the parts where he quotes Scripture! - but much of the book felt a little preachy to me, and there were parts of the book where I felt he was reading into Scripture through the lens of the point he was trying to make. Still, he tells some good stories that illustrate truth, and his heart is in the right place. So I'll give it 2.5 stars - no, actually, 3. The study guide at the end has some really great questions.
Disclosure in agreement with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising": I received this book for free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.
Book Review - Kaleidoscope: Seeing God's Wit and Wisdom In A Whole New Light - by Patsy Clairmont
With wit and wisdom of her own, Patsy Clairmont has written a tremendously engaging book about some of the truths found in the biblical book of Proverbs. Kaleidoscope: Seeing God's Wit and Wisdom in A Whole New Light is, in and of itself, a kaleidoscope of humor, honesty, truth, and humility that shows the reader not only the beauty of God's Word, but also the beauty of what He can do in the lives of those who seek to know Him and to walk in His ways.The book of Proverbs includes a number of short and concise words pictures that communicate truth. Using a kaleidoscope as a word picture of her own, Patsy illustrates in short and concise chapters some of the ways in which even the most broken bits and pieces of our lives can be transformed into something beautiful, when held up to the light of God's Word. Each chapter contains a brief meditation on a single Proverb, complemented by humorous stories from Patsy's own life, followed by a "bits and pieces" section full of thought-provoking questions for either personal reflection or group discussion, and closing with a few other Scriptures that tie in with the theme of the chapter.
I absolutely loved this book and highly recommend it. Patsy writes honestly and empathetically, and is so incredibly funny - and yet the truths she communicates from God's Word are deep and life-changing. There is so much depth and beauty in this book. I'm already looking forward to re-reading it! It's that good. Five stars out of five.
Disclosure in agreement with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising": I received this book for free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.
advent journeys: hope
As previously observed, I love Advent. Currently serving at a non-denominational church that doesn't follow the liturgical calendar, I find myself missing the rhythm of it, especially this time of year. So I decided a couple of weeks ago to do what little I could about it: I bought a book.
My friend Amanda and I are reading The Uncluttered Heart by Beth A. Richardson. It's a daily devotional book that starts the first Sunday of Advent and runs straight thru the 12th day of Christmas. Only 4 days in, I can tell already that it is going to be a sweet few weeks with the Lord. (If you're interested, check out Beth's book and the associated website: unclutteredheart.org - it would be fun if all of us read it together - and every reading stands alone, so you can just hop in, and catch up later.)
So the first week of Advent is about hope....
It was a couple of weeks ago when I wrote about how I was looking for something. I think, in retrospect, that maybe what I was looking for was hope. I hadn't quite realized that I'd lost it. I knew I felt a little stifled, purposeless, not-quite-myself - but I hadn't realized how hopeless I felt, and that hopelessness was ultimately at the root of the deep sadness I felt. Then, this past Sunday, the first Sunday in Advent, I sat down and I read about hope. And I skimmed through the discussion guide and noticed the question: "what are you hoping for this week?" I danced around it. Finally admitted that I was afraid to verbalize what I am really hoping for. Realized this was probably a problem. And went to church.
I had the privilege of worshiping in another country this weekend. I went home over Thanksgiving to visit my family out East and drove back through Canada, and stayed with one of my bestest friends, Cheryl. Cheryl is on staff at a very large church in Toronto that was founded with a huge heart for missions. (My kind of church.) :) This particular morning, they had a guest teacher: born in Wales, missionary to South Africa and several other places, now living in Canada, probably in his 70s, and not a single worry line in his forehead visible onstage. The joy of the Lord shines from within this man - and his passion for seeing the lost come to Jesus pervaded every word of his message.
And it was contagious.
As I listened to him speak about the heart of our Good Shepherd for His lost sheep, and the privilege that we have in being his agents that we so often forsake in what John Stott calls "our guilty silence" - simply not speaking of Jesus - I realized (again) that I have to teach.
It's an interesting grammatical construction that - "I have to..." I could have said "I must." And indeed, I must. It's what I'm called to do. But I have it.... it's been given to me. Teaching. The desire to teach. I'm stifled because I'm not doing it. As a worship leader, I got to teach a little bit. I've missed that. I do teach, here and there. In conversations with people, through letters/emails I write, etc. But that's just like icing on a proverbial cake, you know? The real cake is seriously teaching. Maybe even - dare I say it? - preaching.
I know this isn't new. I've known this for awhile. I've written about it here a number of times, I'm sure. But I've been so stuck in the rut of daily routine that I started to forget that this current daily routine wasn't meant to be a pattern for the rest of my days, but is rather still just a stopping spot - a place to fuel up and ready myself for the next stage of the journey. I wasn't supposed to put down roots so deep that I settled in too comfortably - but I'd started to do that, in spite of a niggling feeling that something didn't feel quite right. I'd settled for "this." I let go of the vision. Proverbs 29:18 says that for lack of vision, people perish - and I've felt the truth of that these past few weeks. In context that verse actually means that without the revelation of God's Word we'd all be dead (and it goes on to say that he who has the law is happy) - but the truth is we need God's word over our lives too. His written Word and His Son are enough - but the God who made dolphins to swim faster than they should be able to and bees to fly when they shouldn't be able to also made us, and has specific plans for us, and we need to be in communion with Him to know what they are. He designed each of us uniquely. And troubled Himself to arrange our moments and our days so that in interacting with each other we would learn and grow and change and become ultimately even more like Him. His design is incredible.
And it was no mistake that His design landed me in Canada on Sunday, hearing a man of God who'd been to South Africa. He didn't even talk about it - but he'd been there. He'd been where I'm going someday. And he believed in the importance of bringing creativity to the mission field, and went out of his way to mention it.
Somewhere out there is a place that fits me, I am sure of it. Or maybe, given this wanderlust, there are several, lol. I don't know where they are, or what they look like, or how I will get there. But I know that I will.
Because on Sunday, I got my hope back. I'm not even sure, really, how it happened. It just did. God gave me hope.
One of Cheryl's friends asked me if I'd been not listening to God or if I'd just been waiting for the pieces to fall into place. It was a good question. It seems I keep forgetting what God has said until reminded (tho being able to search my own blog for themes does come in handy for that; now if only my handwritten journals had that feature, lol!) - but really, I think I've just been waiting. And it feels like maybe that waiting is very close to an end now. Maybe.
It's Advent. The season of waiting. But it's only a season - and that for which we are waiting - it's just around the corner. Jesus is coming. He came, and He's here - and He's coming again.
Spera in Deo.
Amen.
wonderfully...
I've been reading a lot lately, and one of the books I am still valiantly plowing through (not because it's boring, but because it is one of the longest books I have ever purchased) is John G. Lake: The Complete Collection of His Life's Teachings - compiled by Roberts Liardon.
John's journal entries are very interesting, and one of the things I noticed as I was reading yesterday was how often he would comment that "so-and-so was wonderfully saved."
It is wonderful, isn't it? I forget that sometimes, in the midst of all the stuff that I do as a Christian and as a pseudo-staffer at my church, that this is all actually incredibly wonderful and amazing. Why is that? I mean, it's ridiculous of me to not remember that grace is a gift, and an undeserved one at that, and to therefore rejoice in my salvation! But I forget, all the same, and get bogged down in the worries of this life, and the task lists, and the lists of things that didn't get done on last week's task lists, and suddenly life is routine and boring and wonder lies fallow under agenda.
I want wonder to wake up. I want to be so captured by the night sky that I simply sit smack down in the middle of the driveway and look up for half an hour. I want to be so taken with the colors in the sunrise that I actually get up to see what beauty He will paint tomorrow. I want to simply stop in the middle of all of these task lists and be completely okay with a not-quite-spotless floor in favor of quality-time-spent with someone I love. And I want to remember all the things that Jesus saved me from, and rejoice with the deepest possible gratitude and wonder that I am indeed saved, forgiven, accepted, and wanted by God.
I am wonderfully saved. How do I even begin to understand the magnitude of that? But it is true. And it is wonder full.
random ramblings, vol. 4
Seven random glimpses into Happyland, as I try to wind down from a late evening and very obviously not decaffeinated soy chai latte:
2. I pulled my first all-nighter in I-don't-know-how-long this weekend, in a successful effort to finish the painting that needed to get done for our new stage look. It turned out even better than I'd hoped. Still, I am looking forward to not pulling an all-nighter again for quite some time. If ever. :)
3. I made applesauce today. I forgot how much I enjoy doing that.
4. If you haven't seen it yet, and you're a woman blogger, please go see Julie and Julia. It was a great movie. Cooking and blogging. How much better does it get? :) It was also incredibly refreshing to watch a movie that involved two healthy marriages. And I thought it had a pretty accurate take on the delicate balance of blogging and real life. That's all I'm going to say about it right now, but feel free to discuss in the comments. :)
5. Today was an incredibly restful day. A little bit of productivity complemented by a walk and talk with a good friend and an unexpected hang-out time with two other good friends who just happened to be sitting outside at the local coffee shop as I pulled thru the drive-thru (on an unsuccessful hunt for a Maple Scone. they are so good you have to get them in the morning, or they're gone.).
6. I found a copy of I.Q. tonight for $5.00. And yes, it is a $5 sort of movie, but it is still one of my favorites. :)
7. I'm re-reading Madeleine L'Engle's A Circle of Quiet. If you are looking for deep, thought-provoking reading material that leaves you feeling more like yourself than you were when you started.... well, when you put it that way, the Bible is really better for that than anything, but A Circle of Quiet is an excellent complement. :)
another shameless plug
An old friend from my college days has just begun something along the lines of a weekly webcomic. If you're a fantasy-fiction fan, I'm betting you'll like it. :) Check it out: http://www.worldofshandor.com/.
Happy reading! :)
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